Staying Positive When Life Has Other Plans

We often hear phrases like “Stay positive” or “Keep your chin up” thrown around lightly. But what happens when life throws so many curveballs that staying upright—let alone optimistic—feels like a miracle?

Over the past 12 months, my reality has tested me in every way imaginable:

• Prostate surgery

• Melanoma removal, followed by a severe adverse reaction to the antibiotics

• The heartbreak of saying goodbye to our beautiful ginger cat

• Someone close suffering from shingles

• A 7mm kidney stone that took four weeks to remove and included a day of vomiting and most days with chronic pain

  • A stent from kidney to bladder post-surgery

• Preparing to sell our home to move interstate

• Losing 12kg (some of it unintentionally)

• Plus a few more …

And all of this while leading the Technology & Transformation team at a national company, delivering a high-stakes ERP replacement project.

The Hidden Weight: Letting Go of the Role

Perhaps one of the hardest parts, quietly sitting beneath the surface of all the personal and professional challenges, is knowing that I won’t be able to stay in my current role due to the upcoming interstate move.

This transition brings its own kind of emotional complexity—because with it comes the risk of disengagement. When you can see the finish line approaching, and you’re not sure what comes next, it’s tempting to mentally check out or coast. But leadership doesn’t end just because your time in the seat does.

Remaining professional and focused—even when the future feels uncertain—isn’t easy. But it’s sometimes essential. It’s your ability to leave with integrity (if you can). It’s how you honour the team who continues to rely on your support. And, ultimately, it’s how you uphold your own standards, regardless of what’s thrown at you.

Not Everyone Will See You

One of the quieter challenges through this journey has been navigating the undercurrent of politics and perception both professionally and personally.

It’s a tough pill to swallow when your efforts and expertise are ignored or undervalued, especially when you know you’re bringing something important to the table. Sometimes, it’s not about what you know or how you deliver it, but about how others perceive their own status or comfort zone being challenged.

I’ve come to accept that not everyone will see or value your contribution—especially when it challenges them. And that’s okay.

Over time, I’ve learned to choose my battles wisely. I don’t need to call out every slight or defend every corner. Some things reveal themselves in time. The pain or consequences of what’s being hidden, avoided, or misrepresented eventually becomes too big to ignore. When that happens, the truth finds its own voice.

In the meantime, I stay grounded in what I know to be true: my intent, my impact, and my integrity across all areas of my life.

“So, how did I get through it, and what will I continue to do?”

Some reframing helped

Staying positive doesn’t mean denying reality—it means choosing how you frame it. I could have seen each event as a separate blow. Instead, I saw it as a test of resilience and an opportunity to live my values—especially under pressure. Most times it worked.

Have a Purpose

Work became more than a job. At times it was a lifeline. Supporting my team, moving the business forward, and creating clarity in chaos gave me structure when some other things felt uncertain. It also went the other way at times as well. Purpose is a powerful antidote to pain—and even transition. Even the move interstate has a great purpose that has been a dream for some years now. It helps create a pull (not a push) to get you through the tough times.

Be Human With Your Team

I didn’t try to be the invincible leader. I was honest with my team. I shared enough to build connection but always made sure they felt secure and supported when I could. Vulnerability doesn’t weaken leadership—it should help strengthen and build trust.

I will always do my best to present the real me and that is all I ask of you to do with me.

Protect the Basics Relentlessly

Sleep. Nutrition. Movement. Mental space. They became non-negotiables, not luxuries. I had to be strategic with energy, not just time. Some days, that meant stepping away to rest so I could return fully present the next. This was both professionally and personally. We don’t realise how much we give in all areas of our life until we actually stop and look after ourself!

Empower those around you

When you're personally stretched thin, empowering your team and others becomes even more critical. Trust them with more responsibility, give them the autonomy to make decisions, and celebrate their successes. This not only lightens your load but also fosters a sense of ownership and resilience within the team. My team stepped up tremendously, proving their capabilities and commitment, which in turn boosted my own morale.

Celebrate the Wins—Especially the Small Ones

We often focus only on the big project milestones or the big move. But during this season, I learned to celebrate the small wins—no matter how tiny. A productive meeting. A moment of laughter. A supportive message from a colleague, friend, or loved one. They all mattered.

Protect Your Well-being (Non-Negotiable)

This is paramount. When you're constantly giving, you need to replenish your reserves. Even when I was battling severe pain, I made sure to prioritise essential self-care, like getting enough rest (when possible) and finding small moments to de-stress. While planning to put our house on the market and move interstate adds another layer of complexity, it's also a future-focused activity that provides a sense of purpose and progress.

Final Thoughts

Resilience isn’t about being unaffected by life’s challenges—it’s about learning how to move through them without losing yourself. As individuals, we don’t get to choose our storms. But we do get to choose our stance.

Even when facing personal upheaval, role transitions, and the slow goodbye to something you’ve invested deeply in—you can still show up. Still lead. Still finish well.

And even when you’re not seen the way you should be (or would like to be), or you’re misunderstood by those protecting their own domains, you still hold the power to choose your path forward—with focus, integrity, and perspective.

If you’re facing uncertainty, resistance, or transition, remember: You can’t always choose your circumstances, or how others treat you, but you can always choose your response. Stay as positive as you can, be as professional as possible, and finish with whatever strength you can muster. Your friends, your loved ones, your colleagues, your network, and—most important of all—YOU will be better for it.